Henry Livingston, Jr.
Henry Livingston's Prose

DESCRIPTION of the Baby House, &c. of Miss Biddy Puerilla
Jan 19, 1792; By Seignior Whimsicallo Pomposo

The whole ground to be improved, is 16 feet from north to south, and 11 1-2 feet from east to west. On an eminence, made by one of nature's pioneers, a mole, is to be erected the principal edifice, for the accomodation of Miss Biddy's doll Fanny. The five architectural orders are to be stripped of their choicest beauties to decorate it; and obelisks, statues, and columns, are to stand centinels all around.

From a duck trough at the southeast angle, water is to be brought by hydraulic machines; so as to form, almost under the eaves of the palace, a cascade six inches wide and 9 3-4 inches in heighth. This was a desideratum long contemplated, and but lately compleated in the cerrebellum of the above ingenious artist.

The principal street leading from Miss Fanny's palace to that of Miss Clarinda, the next doll in favor; is to be 7 inches wide: and all the diverging lanes 4 1-2 inches broad.

Those parts of the map colored with deep red, are to be appropriated to a number of elegant purposes, too maltifarious to be here enumerated.

Gigantic trees, of the whortle berry and current tribes, are to shed a pleasing gloom over the most important avenues: while the river before mentioned, enriched with delightful tadpoles, is to meander thro' every part of the paradise.

Melodious wrens are engaged to warble from a gooseberry bush, and several well-instructed frogs are to croak the bass. Two elegant kittens will bound along the streets, and Miss Biddy's pied lap-dog Cupie, is to stalk the mammoth of this new creation.

Upon the whole, Miss Biddy is determined, that her improvements shall be so stupendous; as would overwhelm the builders of Palmyra, the constructors of the appian way, and William Penn, himself, with shame and confusion were they present to behold them.

There are not wanting however some captious carping people, who arraign the economy and prudence of Miss Biddy's mamma, for going to such enormous expence to gratify a capricious little minx. This, they observe is to be her third baby house; into a fourth. Besides say they, the old lady should consider, that at the very moment she is fostering these dreams of puny splendor, the garden fence itself is by no means secure; for twice has the great black bull broke through, near the very spot where Miss Biddy is to be indulged in this wonderful wonder: and, add they, should he rush thro when the plan is perfected; adieu in a moment to the palaces, the temples, the obelisks, the naval pillar, the statues, the triumphal arches -- and -- the unfortunate gooseberry bush. R.

Poughkeepsie Journal
Jan 19, 1792; by R and Seignior Whimsicallo Pomposo


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